Unequally Yoked Spouses Club (cont.)

[Spreading Salt]

Wow! That's why we keep some nice scented spray in EVERY room and run for it whenever anyone in the family lets loose! Hopefully things like that will be blasted out of Heaven!

Welcome CrystalClear! I love that song by the way! It is good that hubby is finally verbalizing this stuff. Go Abba Go! Move mountains in this family! Thank you for joining this forum sister!!

[CrystalClear]

Spreading Salt: Thank you for the welcome...and I had no idea that my screen name was a song title, too! It came from something personal the Lord showed me. I describe it here:

http://fulfilledprophecy.com/bb/viewtop ... 858#271858

CC

[Spreading Salt]

Dear Yeshua,

Please surround our unbeliving spouse's with Christian influences. Remove the scales from their eyes so that they can see You at work in their lives. Wake them from their earthly stupor Lord. Time is of the essence. Amen.

[Passion]

I feel the same way--like we don't have much time! I'm witnessing a huge, bizarre spiritual battle in my husband's family that I never thought I'd see--complete with creepy black figures running around, the unsaved spouse hearing voices, etc. At least I think only one of the two is unsaved--I hope so, because the other one is going to need all the spiritual armor he can get!

I pray that God will open the eyes of those who seem to be willingly blinded!

[ChurchGirl]

Hello Sisters and Brothers!
Do you feel the Lord's return? I can! We have to have faith that the Lord will bring us our hearts desires.

We have to believe that it will never be too late for our spouses.
We have to have the crazy faith of a child to do it -but let it happen. Let yourself go to the possibility that FAITH is all it takes.
Then RUN with it.

Your Faith in His Word....His Word in Your Faith....

He is for us, and goes before us...he is our sheild and protector and is so much more faithful than we could ever imagine. I am praying that each and everyone of us here will just bask in His amazing grace this week. Praying that the battles we are seeing before us and in the lives of our loved ones are battles that end in His victory. That none shall perish and all will come to Him. Claiming in faith that this will be!! That God's timing is perfect.

O' Father build our Faith. Strengthen our Faith....but please help us gently...because we know that sometimes to get to that point we must be tried, tested and purfied through the fire. Your mighty will as always please be done. We trust you so much Father! We thank you Jesus for being our deliverer and advocate. Please save our lost husbands and wives...the wanderers and even the rejectors Lord. Save them please.

[joyfulchild]

Thank you dearSister for that wonderful prayer!i FEEL alot IS HAPPENING THIS WEEK AND IT IS EXCITING!Most of all though I feel the Lord is working on my husband(unbeliever) in a big way.His heart is definitely being softened more and more in ways that are startling!!Praises to You Father!We look forward to Your return so so much!!I pray for ALL spouses here that we ALL have the strength to do this His way and not our own!
Bless you guys!
mel

[Passion]

Yay! That's so encouraging to hear about how far your hubby is coming! God is SO good!

He is doing the same thing with my son--who is unequally yoked to his Believing wife. The sometimes mean, and almost always heart-hearted young man is really becoming a softie!

[nickylouse]

Eight short months ago; I gave everything away (to my wife, Jackie) in hope that she might see that God is the most important thing in my life. I sincerely felt that if I could sacrifice all of my worldly possessions and even be willing to give up my life in hope that the Lord would save her - that this could somehow convince her to trust her life to Him. But she only looked at that event as a stunt for attention. I mourn over the fact that she does not know the love of God and that I am incapable of expressing that same kind of love that He has for us.

Three months ago; three months into my divorce; my wife began showing interest in me. Could it be that she wants to know how I can go on from scratch? Or could it be that she realizes that there is probably something to my commitment to Jesus? Will these questions lead her to a deeper desire to know Him? Is He working to reveal Himself to her? Or is she merely lonely and missing the good times that we had together over the past twenty years?

I am in a quandry for I do not know her heart truly. I must be careful because I know that my own heart apart from Christ Jesus is wicked and deceptive. I ask myself daily if I am truly focused on her eternal well-being or not. I feel like one of those people who live with someone who is addicted to drugs or alcohol. Should I be a friend to her? Or should I allow her to go on without me and pray for Jesus to save her?

I cannot be like a husband to her unless we are remarried, fulfilling my obligations as a protector, a provider, a servant leader, the spiritual head of the home - all of those things I long to be to her. I do not know if I should pursue the possibility of being remarried unless we are somewhat compatible spiritually.

Her birthday is in two days and I have plans to take her to a nice hotel for a romantic weekend. I need wisdom, God. She still sees me as her soul mate for life and as much as I enjoy sharing my life with her, we did get divorced. I know You hate it and I promised to work towards reconciliation. I have done my best to remain pure during this trial. You are allowing me to go through it in order to show my faith for what it is. Do I not trust that You will save her without regard to circumstance? Are You waiting for me to take steps of faith? What may I do to honor You?

Dear brothers and sisters in Christ Jesus (here at FP and especially those who share in my sufferings as unequally-yoked spouses), I share this with you hoping that it may encourage you and to request your prayers for God to impart His wisdom to me. I thank you for all the times you've listened and prayed with me. I also give thanks to God for these troubling times. I know that every good and perfect gift comes down from the Father of heavenly lights and that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose. And so let me encourage each of you to listen for Him to call you to purpose as I hold these words close to my own heart.

[bchandler]

Nickylouse,

Firstly... if you are divorced.. remain pure.. romance is one thing...fornication another...

Secondly... IMO, you need to make it very clear that reconciliation with you is completely dependent upon her reconciliation to God...

She must come to see her own need for a savoir... to see her own sin... and to repent of it, and come to Christ.

Thirdly... I would not even consider remarriage until you have seen at least 1 year of good fruit from her... and you...

Lastly... I would seek Godly counsel during that year... to ensure the ground rules for the governing of your houshold, and fair fighting are clearly established... and ensure that person is on-call to mediate between you during that year, and if you do get together again for the year following your reconciliation... at minimum.

Nickylouse... just remember... every time you are tempted... which relationship matters most to you... your relationship with God and his Holy Spirit... or your flesh...

I think this is exactly what Jesus was talking about when he said that of we did not hate our own wives children and even our own lives we were not worthy of him...

He doesn't mean to literally hate them... he means that until our remaining in right relationship with him becomes the dearest thing to us... even above the dearness of our own spouses and children... we are not worthy of him...

Now that is a hard thing... and a tall order to fill... but then that is part of the cross we carry to follow him.

[Sue-M]

BChandler, I agree 1,000% with everything that you said. And mostly, God must be before everything. Even our own lives. It's hard when it comes to our children. But, even then, it must be this way.

And, Nickylouse, I can tell that your heart is in a good place regarding your wife. But, I agree with BC, you should not go to that hotel room with her. Not unless you are married. This will also give her the wrong impression of what it means to be in Christ.

[nickylouse]

I know that I did not necessarily ask you for advice, but I thank God for you - caring enough to give careful consideration to my situation and courageous enough to tell it like it is.

remain pure.. romance is one thing...fornication another...

you should not go to that hotel room with her

I have been wrestling with where our relationship is heading for awhile and my mind has been overwhelmed with emotion. I have been telling myself that the marriage license was not what joined us together... and that a divorce paper is not what can separate us. I interpret "what God has put together, let man not separate " as 'man cannot separate what God puts together' although Moses gave us divorce because God knows our hearts are hard. It is the reason I did not fight her over the divorce - all the while questioning my heart in its possible desire to be free. But I also know that I do not have to give in to eros.

I have been asking myself lately if I am not merely justifying the gratification of the sinful desires of my flesh. I could not see the path of reconciliation with her clearly, but if I am hearing the Holy Spirit correctly, it does not include 1Cor7:3-4. I will seek God's wisdom in finding a way to avoid fornication without alienating Jackie.

[Hippiechic]

Hey guys! I've never popped on here, but I just felt compelled to give you all a bit of hope! I was once an unsaved spouse. Yes, ChrisJ was unequally yoked for a few years! I almost walked out on him... But Jesus got me first. Why? Chris loved Jesus. He was a true Christian. He never let me push him into ending his private time with God. He really did love his Saviour more than me, and I couldn't stand it. I finally couldn't take the pressure, and it was either choose Jesus or leave and I chose Jesus and I stayed. Come to find out that Chris had been praying for me to get saved! I had told him I was saved, and I don't know how he knew, but he knew! He says you can't live two years with an unsaved person and not figure it out... We've been married 6 years now. Of course there's more to the story than that, but that's the basics!

So anyway, I'm praying with you all for your spouses and don't ever give up! I'm thankful everyday for one who didn't give up on me! I think the same goes for you Nickylouse... you may be separated, but you still have the power of prayer and the power to live a life that is an example. Our God is a God of restoration and redemption!

[ChurchGirl]

Praying Nicky.

[bchandler]

Churchgirl,

Not to disagree to harshly.. but...

1Co 7:15 But if the unbelieving depart, let them depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace.

Note that in the case where the unbeliever has departed... there is no marriage bond according to Paul... the bond is broken... and the believing spouse is no longer under any obligation.

This is the current condition of nicky if i read his post correcty...

This being the case... I would not turn again and comitt the act of marriage and again unequally yoke myself to an unbeliever contrary to God's word...

[ChurchGirl]

1 Cr

1Cr 7:1 NOW concerning the things of which you wrote to me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman.
1Cr 7:2 Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband.
1Cr 7:3 Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband. 1Cr 7:4 The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.
1Cr 7:5 Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.
1Cr 7:6 But I say this as a concession, not as a commandment.
1Cr 7:7 For I wish that all men were even as I myself. But each one has his own gift from God, one in this manner and another in that.
1Cr 7:8 But I say to the unmarried and to the widows: It is good for them if they remain even as I am;
1Cr 7:9 but if they cannot exercise self-control, let them marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion.
1Cr 7:10 Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband. 1Cr 7:11 But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And a husband is not to divorce his wife. 1Cr 7:12 But to the rest I, not the Lord, say: If any brother has a wife who does not believe, and she is willing to live with him, let him not divorce her.
1Cr 7:13 And a woman who has a husband who does not believe, if he is willing to live with her, let her not divorce him.
1Cr 7:14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband; otherwise your children would be unclean, but now they are holy.
1Cr 7:15 But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace.
1Cr 7:16 For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife?
1Cr 7:17 But as God has distributed to each one, as the Lord has called each one, so let him walk. And so I ordain in all the churches.

Edited a bit....

[bchandler]

ChurchGirl,

The section of scripture you bolded is refering to how a blieving spouse that departs should behave.

So...
IF Nicky had left because of some unbearable condition within the marriage... his duty would be to remain unmarried in the event reconciliation became possible.

If his unbelieving wife left... then according to Paul the bonds are broken, and the believer is free to marry again.

According to what Nicky was sharing... it seemed as if part of the reason his wife left WAS his faith. (I may be reading to much into what Nicky was saying)

from a purely legal perspective... sex between divorced partners is no different than any other extramarital sex...

Don't get me wrong... I think reconciliation is the highest and best goal... but to be reconciled to an unbeliever and be again unequally yoked would seem to be both counter productive, and contrary to the guidelines we are given in scripture.

We must first keep ourselves in proper relationship with Christ before we can be of any use to others.

What kind of message would Nicky be sending his unbelieving wife regarding the seriousness of his faith if he does go through with being reconciled to an unbeliever?

I am trying to cause people to look at things from the 2 laws perspective... (Love God, Love your neighbor) to keep Christ our central focus...

If we are not willing to lose everything in order to gain Christ... then we are not worthy of him.

The cross is heavy... and the suffering we endure because of it is the mystery of our faith... and faith is accounted as righteousness. I just want to be sure that we don't add to anyone's suffering with legalism.

[nickylouse]

I know that both bchandler and ChurchGirl both have my best in mind. The last thing I would ever want is to cause any little one (or any new believer) to sin. Perhaps this matter would have been better left between myself and Lord Jesus.

[joyfulchild]

I agree with Nicky here.Dear Brother stay close to the Lord as you go through this difficult emotionally trying time.My husband is an unbeliever(for the time being hopefully)and there but for the grace of God go I.

[bchandler]

Nicky,

I am not at all disturbed by your current struggles... I know how hard it is right now...

I just wanted to be sure you were taking a good solid look at God's word and following it... Not your own heart or another person's opinion... right now... you need to draw close and stay close to Jesus...

Or you risk having your emotions over-ride good judgement.

Give it to God. Ask for his guidance and protection. Read and pray over the word yourself... Follow the leading of the Holy Spirit.

and best wishes and prayers... for both you and your wife...

don't feel ashamed of being open and vulnerable... we all need to be transparent with eachother... for the sake of the kingdom... and our love for one another.

[Melissas210]

Just want you all to know I am always praying for all of you and your spouses (and mine as well)! It is such a blessing to have all of you to rely on for advice, and to come to in prayer. I love you all!!!

[ChurchGirl]

Praying over each and every one of you tonight. Claiming in faith that your spouses will be saved. Never giving up and never giving in...Loving you all so much!

In 6 more days it will be 1 year since my husband was saved. I began to think about all the bad stuff that has happened to us this year and then I remembered it all started the day my hubbie called on Jesus! The enemy sure has been one angry little dude these past twelve months and yet my husband is digging in to his faith....I cannot brag or boast - because it is by the grace of God I can even begin to say these things....

You know, Spurgeon does a great study on this..(I'll post more on this this week)..accepting Christ is one sure fire instananeous way of getting the enemy's attention. And as I begin to look back over the year I can pull scripture after scripture from the Word in the new testament that tells me not to be surprised by the hardships that follow after salvation. In fact, we are to embrace them.

Have faith brothers and sisters...for whatsoever you believe....Mat 21:22 And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive.

I love you!

[joyfulchild]

Thanks for that wonderful encouragement!!Am struggling tonite to even pray for him-its been one of those days

[BethelKid]

Hello, everyone...I hope it's okay for me to jump in here. I am not really sure if my husband is saved or not, so I'm not in the same exact situation as most of you. But as we have recently been going through a terrible time in our marriage (hubby wants to leave), I have been in the Word, in prayer, and also reading every Christian marriage book I can find. I just wanted to suggest one fantastic book that I learned about through the Focus on the Family website, called Love and Respect, by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs. The folks on the FOTF discussion board kept saying it was the most helpful thing they had ever read regarding marriage, and many had come back from the brink of divorce as a result of implementing the godly principles in the book. It's all based on Scripture, and in a nutshell it explains that in order for marriages to thrive, men must have respect from their wives, and women must have love from their husbands. It goes on to show that God commanded those very things in His Word...wives to respect their husbands, and husbands to love their wives. It's extremely easy to read & understand, gives practical ideas of how to show respect or love, and has countless testimonials of how God worked in hopeless situations when at least one spouse started applying these Scriptural principles. The reason I am bringing it up to you guys is that the author talks about how the wife's conduct (for example) can sometimes win over her husband to the Lord, as we learn in the Word. It may be a real help to some of you, if you are not already familiar with it. I had never heard of the book until a week ago, but now that I've read it, it has been very eye-opening and convicting. One of the best parts is towards the end, when the author talks about how everything we do in a loving or respectful way towards our spouse is really being done unto the Lord, and that if we'll realize that Jesus is who we are ultimately treating kindly or unkindly, not our spouse, it'll make a big difference in our willingness to be Christlike, even when our spouse treats us terribly. Well, sorry to ramble on...I just thought it might help encourage you in your very trying circumstances and give some practical ways to improve things on the homefront. I just started applying the ideas, but I'm believing God for a miracle. God bless you guys.

Holly

[ChurchGirl]

Hi BethelKid - In no way am I about to toot my own horn, but I humbly say this....the only thing I could do - or how I contributed to the events that got my husband to Jesus was to do exactly what you are saying here.

Applying biblical principles to my life and my submission to my husband - and it is not easy. It still isn't easy even though Mike is walking with the Lord.

All of a sudden, hubbie now says, I stopped doing the things that the Bible tells me not to do. I started listening I started submitting and I began to allow the Lord to change me. BEGGED HIM to change me, increase my patience, and SUBMIT.

...Of course there is much more and many talks of how I nearly bit off my tongue many many times, cried countless tears on the floor in the bathroom...the book for me was Power of a Praying Wife and my Bible of course....had Mike threaten to leave me over my faith....It was three years of me changing and growing with God for me to see a NEW ME inside my heart....

....but God told me that if I was faithful to Him, He would be evermore faithful to me. HE IS SO FAITHFUL!!!! I HAD to change before Mike could. It was the only way. 9 months from the day the Lord told me Mike would be saved he was. Those 9 months were the rockiest and most difficult for me, claiming in faith that God would move mountains for me to equally yoke our marriage in Him.

.....The Lord placed this board on my heart and I do believe had me start this chat room specifically to be able to encourage and share my heartaches and triumphs with those who are in the same boat....to show it is possible...we just must trust and believe Him and believe His Word, and in His precious and perfect timing our prayers will be answered, and our loved ones will be saved.

This is why I am so Thankful this week. I know that what we've been going through has drawn my husband to the Lord. So I gladly bear the weight of all that is crashing down around me. Especially this week, as I reflect on all the Lord has done for us - all that matters, really ALL that matters is that we are together as one in Christ Jesus. God will take care of the rest.

[ChurchGirl]

:grin: Thanks for that wonderful encouragement!!Am struggling tonite to even pray for him-its been one of those days

Many many nights I spent in prayer over my un-saved husband while he slept or while he yelled or while he not only rejected me but worse rejected God. It is not an easy battle we face dear sister. Praying for you and over you and your hubbie tonight especially. There will be rest and there will be joy. Have faith, because it is our faith that makes the difference. You have the power to move mountains, don't even doubt you have the power to pray for your hubbie to be saved and God won't do that too. You are filled with the Holy Spirit and you are yoked together with this man...think about the word yoked...and imagine being tied together with the bonds of Jesus. It is bound to rub off on hubbie! Just remember to pray...LORD...I am angry, I am tried and I want to pray for him....give me a heart and fill me with the spirit to bless him in YOUR holy name.

God is SOOOOOOOOO Faithful. It is heart's desire that all come to him, and He tells us the power is in our faith. For a whole year all I did was ask for Him to increase my faith. YIKES - because it isn't flowers and champagne that makes your faith strong it is the fiery furnance.

[Operator]

I don't even know where to start here.

I haven't been here in awhile - been struggling with my own spirituality and staying focused on God...it's been hard. Satan knows this...and has definitely been throwing things at me.

It's no secret that I'm in an abusive relationship - emotionally - not really physically. But twice now (Since we have been married - 2.5 years) my hubby has came at me and done some sort of physical thing to me. We have a son - who will be 2 next week...and I'm not sure that I would be with my hubby had it not been for my son. He's still young - but he isn't blind. Two nights ago - it happened again and my husband came at me. He is a controller and I am not allowed to get angry or upset. If I do - it angers him and things get out of control. I got angry a couple nights ago and I should've called the police, but I was scared. My little boy saw everything and I don't want him to grow up thinking it's ok for a man to do what his dad did to me.

Long story short - I'm not sure if I can stay with him. He's an unbeliever...and he has anger issues...BIG TIME. He doesn't see it - and I honestly believe that he has twisted things in his own mind - to make things ALWAYS my fault. He blames me for him swearing and coming at me like he did. He blames me for him throwing the only thing I had left from my grandmother - across the room and smashing it against the wall. He blames me for him yanking the phone out of the wall and breaking it - while I tried to call 911.

I'm to the point where I just can't take it anymore and I just want to be alone...me and my son. I'm not telling you all this because I want your sympathy...or because I want advise...I get enough of that from my therapist. I am telling you this because I need prayer - because I don't think I can continue to be married to someone who treats me this way.

[nickylouse]

Lord Jesus, lover of my soul, I'm not sure why you allow some of us to have been joined with unbelievers. Some of us have been forced into an unequally-yoked marriage through Your saving grace upon one of us after our marriage. And I also cannot see why You allow what seems like so much time to pass before our spouses are also saved.

Our spirits may be willing, Lord, but our flesh is weak and we get worn out. Some of us like our dear sister in Christ, Operator, have so much to deal with. I know that there are others here who also face harsh circumstances. If it were only that we should pay for our mistakes in being joined with an unbeliever, then that could almost seem right. But You call us to love our spouses, which is harder to do when we do not share the most important aspect of our life, being a relationship with You. So we claim Your promise - not as though we are worthy to claim it, but because You are the True and Faithful one - and so we claim the promise that You work in all things, especially the things we cannot see happening, for the good of those who love You... and we do love You Lord; it must be so or we would not mourn as we do over our unsaved spouses. Most of us would have been long gone if our love for You were not as it is.

We also know that the suffering we endure is not from You. Although Your plan for our lives are to bring honor and glory to You, Lord, we ask for Your grace in comforting us in the midst of our trials. Please give us the peace and joy that comes from knowing how deep and wide Your love is that surpasses all knowledge.

Help us to be those who are called according to Your purpose. Remove all of our pride or other sin that we foolishly hang on to. Help us to trust You completely. Soften the hearts of those we love so dearly and are joined together to have become one flesh with. We know that these who are yet unsaved need You more than anything. We know that You love them much more than we can imagine. We also know You are counting every tear we shed as You suffer with us. Let us also suffer with You as You mourn the passing of time in the lives of those who are yet to be saved so that we never become unmindful of their greatest need to be Yours.

We give You praise for the comforting and encouraging words of those who have seen their prayers answered as we look forward to seeing Your work happen all around us. In the mean time, we ask for Your wisdom in handling every moment of our day. If this prayer be Your will, Amen.

[Passion]

Oh Operator! I know you didn't want any sympathy, but how about some empathy? Because I used to be married to someone who was was extremely emotionally abusive and "not really" physically abusive. But he was physically abusive in that he shoved me to the floor one night and sat on me and wouldn't let me up, because he didn't want me to leave (after all, it's hard to control someone who isn't there). He had been being mean (again) and I calmly and politely told him (since I, too, was not allowed to get upset, or even change my facial expression or tone of voice at all--I had to act like a robot all the time or else) that I was going to go stay at a motel and return in the morning, because I didn't want to fight. He finally got tired of this latest control game, got up off of me and drunkenly wandered out into another room--and I took the opportunity to call the cops. As always, the annoying 911 operator kept trying to get me to stay on the line, long after I had given her all the info needed to know what was going on and to find my house. But I could hear him coming back, and I told her I was afraid he'd kill me if he found me on the phone with 911, and that I was taking off....I dropped the phone (this was in the mid-'90's, so my phone was not a portable) and ran out the back door, around to the front and managed to get in my car and take off before he figured out where I was. About a 1/4 mile down the road I saw the cop car heading toward my house (very slowly! Thanks a lot!), and I stopped and told them I was the one who called. We both pulled over and they asked me to sit in the back with one of them as he took a report, and as we were talking, who should come crashing through the woods and staggering out into the street (nearly running headlong into the cop car), but Psycho himself. He admitted he'd been looking for me, but tried to act all innocent like he was just worried. They ended up taking me to a friend's for the night, and not even arresting him (they just told him to go home and sleep it off). They asked me if I wanted them to arrest him and I said no, which was a bold-faced lie--there was nothing I would have liked better just then than to see him rot in jail forever--but like most battered women, I was too scared of what he'd do when he got out the next day. The really crummy thing was, in this state the cops are not allowed to do that--in a case where domestic violence is suspected, they are required by law to arrest the abuser, whether the victim wants them to or not. As someone who had been married to a cop, I knew this. It wasn't until a few years ago I actually admitted to my first husband that this had happened....I was too embarassed, because I knew better. He was furious at the cops not doing their job, and furious with psycho--said he always knew the guy was crazy. Oh well.

It was truly the Night from Hell....in fact, life in general with him was a living hell....so much so that one night when he was being an abusive freak I even locked myself in the bathroom and took a bunch of sleeping pills, along with lots of booze. And tried to slash my wrists, but fortunately I was too drunk to do much there. I didn't really want to die, and as soon as I'd done it and started to fall asleep, I regretted it because of my two babies (about 9 and 11 at the time). I felt so awful about having made such an absolute hash of my life, and was about to finish it in such an awful way, and with young children who very much loved and needed their mother--undeserving as I was. At some point as I was drifting off Psycho got the door open and came in (he was drunk as always) and asked me what I was doing lying on the bathroom floor. I mumbled something about having taken a bunch of sleeping pills and trying to cut my wrists because he was so mean and abusive, and I just couldn't live like this anymore, and didn't know what else to do. He tried for a few minutes to keep me awake, but I finally got to where I could hear him but it was just too much trouble to respond. At this point I guess he decided I was a really boring conversationalist, and gave up trying to wake me and took advantage of me instead. But he was so drunk he gave that up, too, and went to bed. He never did call for help, and it was only by God's amazing grace that I lived . I vaguely remembering at some point even admitting to Him that I was stupid and made a complete mess of everything, and that I really didn't want to die. I wasn't even a Christian then, but God being God, He knew that one day I would truly give my life to Him, and I don't believe He would let anyone who He knows will eventually choose Him to die until after they've turned over their life to Him. That wouldn't make sense. At least, that's the only reason I can think of that He'd let me live that night. Thank God, both those horrible nights my kids weren't there--they were at their dad's.

I'm sorry this is so long.....I just wanted you to know that I know what you're going through. I may not know exactly how you feel--how could I since I'm not you--but I have a pretty good idea. In a way I think, though, that it was easier for me to boot his sorry butt out than it would be for you, because I wasn't saved then. I'd been attending a good church, and was starting to want Jesus in my life--but I wasn't quite there yet.

So you and all the unequally yoked spouses are heavy on my heart tonight--especially those who are in abusive relationships. On my heart and in my prayers.

[ChurchGirl]

Agreeing in prayer with Nicky....I love you so much Operator. God knows your heart and will show you the way, even if it is out of that marriage or home. That's the great thing about grace my love. Whatever choice we make He allows as long as we CHOOSE HIM. You have clearly chosen God, and now I am going to get on my knees for you.

I truly love you - and if you need ANYTHING at all - please please email me....my phone has been shut off until I can get money - but I can call you from my office or even just chat.

YOU ARE NOT ALONE. Don't even let yourself think that.

[ChurchGirl]

and with you Operator...for all of us here.

[joyfulchild]

to that and for your wonderful prayer nickylouse.You guys are lights shining in the darkness Nickylouse-you spoke to my heart about our spouses-thank you for standing in the gap and speaking to the Father when so many times I CANT-IM literally lost for words.

[ChurchGirl]

Nice to see you here Joyful!

[joyfulchild]

Thanks for the welcome dear Sister.How are you going??

[ChurchGirl]

1Jo 5:14 And this is the confidence that we have in him, that, if we ask any thing according to his will, he heareth us:


1Jo 5:15 And if we know that he hear us, whatsoever we ask, we know that we have the petitions that we desired of him.


2Pe 3:9 The Lord is not slack concerning his promise, as some men count slackness; but is longsuffering to us-ward, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance.

This is profound people and something I have been studying for almost 9 months now. And instead of breaking down why I think our spouses will be saved, I point you to the most amazing scriptures for us unequally yoked spouses.

Get out of your mind that because we are talking about free will, that our spouses will have the option to deny Jesus. Somehow, someway (God have mercy on us all) your spouses WILL BE SAVED.

It may not be pretty, mind you - you may have to give up a lot....probably more than you've ever imagined. You may have to actually go through a true JOB experience...you may have to face trials that you never wanted to experience....but they will be saved. God has already said YES to us. He is going to do what it takes to lead them to the fold.

God tells us so. Can you believe His Word tonight? He tells us we already HAVE what we have asked for.

Chew on these scriptures this weekend for me, and join with me, claiming in Faith that your spouse will be saved. Join with me in believing this race has already been won, we are just waiting for the photo finish.

[joyfulchild]

I AM chewing on THIS as we speak dear Sister.It IS a heartwarming humbling awe inspiring thing to read....God is SO AMAZING!

[ChurchGirl]

I'm still kind of overwhelmed by it Joyfulchild. I mean, it was like this weekend a light clicked on and it came down to these three simple and profound scriptures. I had been focusing on the whatsoever part but not His will. Put the two together and WOW. BAM! Celebrating with you tonight sister - your spouse is (claiming it) saved and is already tagged by Jesus Himself to be in the fold!

WOO WOO!!!

[ChurchGirl]

1Jo 5:14 And this is the confidence that we have in him, that, if we ask any thing according to his will, he heareth us:


1Jo 5:15 And if we know that he hear us, whatsoever we ask, we know that we have the petitions that we desired of him.


2Pe 3:9 The Lord is not slack concerning his promise, as some men count slackness; but is longsuffering to us-ward, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance.

This is profound people and something I have been studying for almost 9 months now. And instead of breaking down why I think our spouses will be saved, I point you to the most amazing scriptures for us unequally yoked spouses.

Get out of your mind that because we are talking about free will, that our spouses will have the option to deny Jesus. Somehow, someway (God have mercy on us all) your spouses WILL BE SAVED.

It may not be pretty, mind you - you may have to give up a lot....probably more than you've ever imagined. You may have to actually go through a true JOB experience...you may have to face trials that you never wanted to experience....but they will be saved. God has already said YES to us. He is going to do what it takes to lead them to the fold.

God tells us so. Can you believe His Word tonight? He tells us we already HAVE what we have asked for.

Chew on these scriptures this weekend for me, and join with me, claiming in Faith that your spouse will be saved. Join with me in believing this race has already been won, we are just waiting for the photo finish.

pssst - I learned a secret today.... The Joy of the Lord is our Strength. It's like the spinach for Popeye, the hair of Samson, the power in His Word...

Joy in Him....it is what makes us undefeatable!!! Judo-CHOP!

Now keep chewing....

[joyfulchild]

I feel so uplifted by your words!!Thanks!By the way my attitude towards hubbys salvation HAS changed ALOT because of this DEAR Church Girl!!Hugs to you dear Sister!!

BY the way-hows the phone situation??

[ChurchGirl]

LOL - it is funny you should ask - I get a new phone on Tuesday - andit is going to be PINK (my fave color)!

My dad was able to add me to his family plan so both hubbie and I will be able to talk again by Thanksgiving! His plan happens to be the only plan that will work here in AK and the lower 48 with no extra charges. LOL...God is sooooooooooooooo good!

Faith is a powerful thing Joyful, isn't it! I am dancing with you 1/2 a world away...BTW - I think it is so fabulous you are in Australia. You guys got the coolest accents!

[joyfulchild]

Thats great news about the phone!And pink too!God IS blessing isnt He!AK is Alaska isnt it??Hows it going up there??I bet you miss your man.I had a HUGELY BLESSED day too!!God IS great!!I cant wait to see everyone oneday from FP can you??I reckon you and I would recognize eachother as would Roma Lynn and Ive Seen Angels,Runner for Jesus,Candy and OH So may others!!Blessings to you Sister for your infectious enthusiasm for His Wonderful Word!!You bring a smile to my face and a song in my heart!!
Love Mel

[ChurchGirl]

I think we all have agreed that we will have our own special FP neighborhood. I've promised to throw the first block party! AK is Alaska and I miss them soooo much. Not much longer now and we will all be together again.

[Spreading Salt]

Operator,

Hang in there sis! God is on the throne and He is in control.

Nickylouse,

I am still in tears over your wonderful prayer. Thank you!

Passion,

Girl, you amaze me! I am so very grateful that you did not succeed with the pills and razor. Thank you for your testimony. I know God will use it as only He can in the lives of the rest of us!

Churchgirl,

Your enthusiasm is totally contagious! Thank you for reminding us of God's wonderful promises. My hubby and I will definitely attend your fabulous block party!!!

Happy Thanksgiving if I don't get back to you guys prior to it!

Loving you and praying for fresh strength in our marriages this day and every day until the Lord of Lords returns or calls us home.

[Passion]

Love you all! And yes, if we don't chat before then, then happy Thanksgiving! We have sooooo much to be thankful for--every day!

And Joyfulchild, so glad you've joined us. Woo-hoo!

P.S. don't know how in the world I ended up with a double-post, but now I can't get rid of one of them! I used to be able to by clicking "edit"; and then I could have sworn there was (in the list of choices right under the white box where you type) an option you could check that said "delete this post"--but now I don't see anything like that. Anyone know how to delete a post?

[Lookfortruth]

Passion, I deleted the extra post for you.

[joyfulchild]

HAPPY THANKSGIVING to all of u!!!And thanks for the welcome!!!Father thank you big time for leading me here!!

[Passion]

Passion, I deleted the extra post for you.

Thanks so much, Candy! So, can we no longer delete our posts ourselves, or was I missing something there?

[Lookfortruth]

I don't think members could ever delete the whole post, but you should be able to edit it. Not sure why you did not have the edit button, unless you were not logged in.

[Passion]

I had the edit button, and used it. The post came up on the little white screen for editing, as always. It's just that there used to be an option where you could put a check mark; I think it said "delete this post". I know because in the past, when I'd get those server error messages when I'd post and hit the "submit" button, I would think that it didn't work and try again--thus winding up with double-post, sometimes. So when that happened I'd hit "edit", and put a check mark in the "delete this post" option, which is not longer there....it seems to have disappeared since they went to the new server or whatever they did. This time I did not have any error message, so I didn't hit the "submit" button twice...so I have no idea why it double-posted.

Would it be possible for you to check and find out whatever happened to the "delete this post" option?

Sorry, didn't mean to hijack the thread! Maybe you could p.m. me if you find out anything. Thanks!

[Melissas210]

Hi everyone,
Happy Thanksgiving!!

Please pray for my family and me! I am going through a rough time. My husband and I got in to a heated debate regarding religions and faith last night during dinner. It is to long to endure in a post, but my family does not understand why I won't go to church (I and the children have been baptized Lutheran, and my husband Catholic). My husband made it very clear that my "online church" doesn't understand anything. He does not believe in any end time events, and basically made it clear to the children that I am crazy. You wouldn't believe the things coming from his mouth! Some of it really concerns me (all regarding religions). In a nutshell, he was pretty much rebuking much of the bible...trying to give his version of the history of all religions. And then he says, "What makes you think Christianity is right? Afterall, there were many religions before Christianity!" I am still a baby in Christ I guess you could say, and I just can't come up with the witnessing tools I need! I kept silently praying that the right words would come, but I couldn't seem get them out!

Well, I will stop rambing, but I would just ask for a prayer for all of them (and me). I feel like the girls are beginning to believe more of what he says than what I say about Christ. Thanks!

[Passion]

Melissa, has your husband ever read any of the Bible? Do you think (since he is, after all, so open-minded concerning religion! ) he would be willing to read any of it? You could point him to the Gospel of John--just the first few verses can blow you away, if you have an open heart and mind.

Jhn 1:1 In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.
Jhn 1:2 He was in the beginning with God.
Jhn 1:3 All things came into being through Him, and apart from Him nothing came into being that has come into being.
Jhn 1:4 In Him was life, and the life was the Light of men.
Jhn 1:5 The Light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not comprehend it.
Jhn 1:6 There came a man sent from God, whose name was John.
Jhn 1:7 He came as a witness, to testify about the Light, so that all might believe through him.
Jhn 1:8 He was not the Light, but {he came} to testify about the Light.
Jhn 1:9 There was the true Light which, coming into the world, enlightens every man.
Jhn 1:10 He was in the world, and the world was made through Him, and the world did not know Him.
Jhn 1:11 He came to His own, and those who were His own did not receive Him.
Jhn 1:12 But as many as received Him, to them He gave the right to become children of God, {even} to those who believe in His name,
Jhn 1:13 who were born, not of blood nor of the will of the flesh nor of the will of man, but of God.
Jhn 1:14 And the Word became flesh, and dwelt among us, and we saw His glory, glory as of the only begotten from the Father, full of grace and truth.

Right there The Bible is telling us about the Trinity, and that Jesus (the Word) was the Person of the Trinity who created the world, and us. And most of the ones He created ("His own") didn't receive Him; but the ones who did were "born again" (see how John 1:13 dovetails perfectly with what Jesus tells Nicodemus in John 3:3-8). It plainly says that God became human and lived among us. And that those who were "born again" were the ones who were saved.

Another verse that blows my mind is Job 19:25: "As for me, I know that my Redeemer lives, And at the last He will take His stand on the earth. Redeemer? Take His stand upon the earth? My, my, how could have Job, waaay back around 1500 BC, have possibly known that? And:

Job 38:1 Then the LORD answered Job out of the whirlwind and said,
Job 38:2 "Who is this that darkens counsel By words without knowledge?
Job 38:3 "Now gird up your loins like a man, And I will ask you, and you instruct Me!
Job 38:4 "Where were you when I laid the foundation of the earth? Tell {Me,} if you have understanding,
Job 38:5 Who set its measurements? Since you know. Or who stretched the line on it?
Job 38:6 "On what were its bases sunk? Or who laid its cornerstone,
Job 38:7 When the morning stars sang together And all the sons of God shouted for joy?
Job 38:8 "Or {who} enclosed the sea with doors When, bursting forth, it went out from the womb;
Job 38:9 When I made a cloud its garment And thick darkness its swaddling band,
Job 38:10 And I placed boundaries on it And set a bolt and doors,
Job 38:11 And I said, 'Thus far you shall come, but no farther; And here shall your proud waves stop'?
Job 38:12 "Have you ever in your life commanded the morning, {And} caused the dawn to know its place,
Job 38:13 That it might take hold of the ends of the earth, And the wicked be shaken out of it?
Job 38:14 "It is changed like clay {under} the seal; And they stand forth like a garment.
Job 38:15 "From the wicked their light is withheld, And the uplifted arm is broken.
Job 38:16 "Have you entered into the springs of the sea Or walked in the recesses of the deep?
Job 38:17 "Have the gates of death been revealed to you, Or have you seen the gates of deep darkness?
Job 38:18 "Have you understood the expanse of the earth? Tell {Me,} if you know all this.
Job 38:19 "Where is the way to the dwelling of light? And darkness, where is its place,
Job 38:20 That you may take it to its territory And that you may discern the paths to its home?
Job 38:21 "You know, for you were born then, And the number of your days is great!
Job 38:22 "Have you entered the storehouses of the snow, Or have you seen the storehouses of the hail,
Job 38:23 Which I have reserved for the time of distress, For the day of war and battle?
Job 38:24 "Where is the way that the light is divided, {Or} the east wind scattered on the earth?
Job 38:25 "Who has cleft a channel for the flood, Or a way for the thunderbolt,
Job 38:26 To bring rain on a land without people, {On} a desert without a man in it,
Job 38:27 To satisfy the waste and desolate land And to make the seeds of grass to sprout?
Job 38:28 "Has the rain a father? Or who has begotten the drops of dew?
Job 38:29 "From whose womb has come the ice? And the frost of heaven, who has given it birth?
Job 38:30 "Water becomes hard like stone, And the surface of the deep is imprisoned.
Job 38:31 "Can you bind the chains of the Pleiades, Or loose the cords of Orion?
Job 38:32 "Can you lead forth a constellation in its season, And guide the Bear with her satellites?

I love God's bit of sarcasm there to one He considers a "know-it-all". But if God didn't put these things in the writer's head, how would he have ever known any of the geological and astronomical facts that are still accepted today? Actually, all of Job Ch. 38-39 are amazing. Well, the whole Bible is amazing, of course, but what really gets me about these verses in Amos and especially Job is, Job is the earliest book of the Bible, written shortly after the Flood around 1500 BC; written btw, before not only Christianity but even Judaism!

Job 40:2 "Will the faultfinder contend with the Almighty? Let him who reproves God answer it."

Amo 5:8 He who made the Pleiades and Orion And changes deep darkness into morning, Who also darkens day {into} night, Who calls for the waters of the sea And pours them out on the surface of the earth, The LORD is His name.

Isa 40:21 Do you not know? Have you not heard? Has it not been declared to you from the beginning? Have you not understood from the foundations of the earth?
Isa 40:22 It is He who sits above the circle of the earth, And its inhabitants are like grasshoppers, Who stretches out the heavens like a curtain And spreads them out like a tent to dwell in.

Really, now! It wasn't until after Columbus went around the world that they figured out that the world was round. Before that the conventional wisdom was that the earth was a flattened disk. Good evidence for questioning conventional "wisdom", even today. Then there's the indisputable fact that archaeologists have uncovered so many cities and sites that the Bible talks about, but that at one time or another "conventional wisdom" said did not exist (like Ninevah, Babylon, etc.). The Smithsonian even issued a paper claiming that they can use the Bible to find archaeological sites, but not so with the Book of Mormon--the stuff the Book of Mormon claims is there, isn't. Not to mention the 8-spiked chariot wheels found at the bottom of the Red Sea, at the only point it would have been possible for a couple million people to cross--the 8-spoke being the wheel used only during the 18th dynasty of the pharaoh's around 1400 BC. But my point is that these archaeological finds and Bible verses I've cited, plus many, many, more, show the Bible to be true--the inspired Word of God. In fact, taken all together, the whole Bible shows the Bible to be the inspired Word of God. There is just NO WAY that 66 different books, written over a time period of more than 1600 years (approx. 1500 BC to AD 100), by such a diverse crowd ranging from kings to prophets to fishermen to tax collectors, could possible jibe at all--unless of course, it was supernaturally inspired. And yet, if you read and study it from beginning to end, you find that it all flows together perfectly. Even the things that the detractors claim don't jibe, like the fact that there are some things in one or two of the Gospels that aren't in others, do not contradict each other. Look, if you and three other people are in a college composition class, and the Prof. assigns the four of you to attend the Macy's Thanksgiving day parade and then write an essay on it, each of you is going to have a few differences in your essays. All four of you may say you saw a giant float with a huge turkey flying overhead go by, and you all may report that you saw Santa Clause. But you may say in your essay that you saw Santa Clause wave, and another may say in his essay that he saw Santa Clause throw candy to the crowd. Yet another may say that there were some in the crowd who booed Santa Clause, or booed the Thanksgiving float. The fourth person may report that many people applauded these floats. So whose lying? None of you are--you just happened to observe different things. You may not have noticed the drill team go by, because you were focused on the equestrian unit (I know I would be!); but one of the other three may have been focused on the drill team. You all saw the same parade go by, but because you were all at different parts along the route at different times, you sometimes saw different things, sometimes you all saw the same thing. And also, even though you are all reporting the truth--still, you each have your own personality and literary style. And God can use the individual personality of style of each of you. And btw, while you and the other three are on the ground, busy watching the parade the best you can, what of the person who is fortunate enough to get to watch it from a high-rise building, with a birds-eye view? He can see the whole thing at once--the Beginning from the End.

I apologize if this is too long....but I know what it's like to be questioned at length and ranted at by someone who thinks he has all the answers, and to not be able to really answer him back. I still have that problem, because I just don't articulate well when it comes to speaking, especially if I'm under pressure. I do much better when I write--hence many emails back and forth between me and my loving but stubborn, know-it-all, and unsaved son. I hope this helps a little.

For patience, wisdom and discernment for you; protection for your children's hearts form the things he is saying; and for his heart to be softened, resulting in his salvation!